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Detective cases · 30

The Green Droppings

青粪

A stolen goose, a rigged test, and the crowd fooled

Anonymous (Ming dynasty)5 min readTranslation for this edition
Beside Song-era rice fields, white geese chase away one soaked goose while a sly servant and an angry farmhand argue before a watching crowd.
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It is told that in the county town of Tong'an lived a man named Gong Kun, married to a woman of the Li family; his household was very well off, but he was by nature extremely stingy. One day it happened to be the birthday of his father-in-law, the elder Li, and Gong Kun prepared gifts and sent his servant Changcai to offer congratulations, instructing him before he left: "He may accept a few of the other things, but on no account let him keep this goose." Changcai agreed and went. When he reached the elder Li's house, the old man was pleased with the gifts and asked, "Why didn't your master come to drink with us himself?" Changcai said, "He happened to be tied up with business and couldn't come." The elder had the cook receive the gifts. The cook, seeing how meager they were, picked out the slightly better ones and accepted just one or two — and so accepted the goose.

Changcai was unhappy, fearing his master would scold him when he got home. He drank a few cups and gloomily shouldered his baskets for the journey back. About a li outside the town he saw a flock of white geese in a field. Looking around and seeing no one, he went down into the field, picked out a big one and caught it, put it in a fish pond and soaked all its feathers, then put it in his cage. But the servant who tended the geese, a man named Zhaolu, happened to be on his way home and had run into Changcai by the hillside when there was no goose in his cage; and when Zhaolu came back to the field, he saw Changcai putting a goose into the cage and walking off. Zhaolu shouted and gave chase, but Changcai paid him no mind and kept walking. After quite a stretch of road they happened to meet Zhaolu's master returning from the county seat, and Zhaolu called out, "Master, that fellow ahead with the cage has stolen one of our geese — catch him, quick!" Hearing this, the master grabbed hold of him. Changcai set down his load and said, "How rude you people are! What do you mean by grabbing a man for no reason?" The master said, "You stole my goose, and you ask what I mean by grabbing you?" The two began to quarrel.

A crowd of passers-by happened along and tried to settle the dispute: "Since you say he stole the goose, let us sort it out for you. Take it back and put it in the flock: if it joins right in, it's yours; if it doesn't, and they chase each other about, it must be his." Changcai said, "Good sense, everyone. Let's go back and try it." Changcai let the goose out into the flock. The other geese, seeing its feathers all wet and not looking as before, chased each other about and would not let it join. The crowd all said, "This goose belongs to Changcai. How can you, master and servant, be so dishonest? Give it back to him." The master, rebuked by the crowd, felt foolish and gave Zhaolu a thorough tongue-lashing. Zhaolu said, "On the road ahead I clearly saw there was no goose in his cage, and when I got to the field I saw him catch a goose and bring it out of the water — how could it not join the flock?" Unwilling to let it go and determined to get to the bottom of it, the two came to blows.

Just then Lord Bao happened to pass that way, saw the two fighting, and asked what it was about. Each told his side. Lord Bao looked the goose over carefully and thought: If it's Zhaolu's goose, why doesn't it join the flock? If it's Changcai's, how would the other man dare to accuse him out of nothing? There must be a reason. He thought of a plan: he told both men to go home, took the goose to the county yamen, and instructed them to come and collect it early the next morning.

The next day the constables called the two men into the yamen to collect the goose. Lord Bao looked at it himself and said, "This goose is Zhaolu's." Changcai said, "Your Honor, yesterday everyone said it was mine — how can you award it to him today?" Lord Bao said, "You live in the town, so the geese you keep must be fed on grain; he lives outside the town and lets his geese loose in the fields, where all they eat is grass and greens. A goose that eats grain leaves yellow droppings; one that eats grass and greens leaves green droppings. These droppings are all green — what are you still arguing about?" Changcai said, "If it's his, why did his flock chase it about yesterday and not let it join?" Lord Bao said, "You slave, still arguing! You soaked its feathers with water; when the other geese saw it looked different, how could they not chase it?" The goose was returned to Zhaolu, and Lord Bao ordered his attendants to give Changcai twenty heavy strokes and throw him out. When the townspeople heard of it, the whole county spread the tale, and all called Lord Bao a god.

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Original source ↗
青粪
Text-first edition · Narration coming soon · 先发文字版 · 朗读即将上线 · /stories/qing-fen/
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